What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
my liver is dry heaving
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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