It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
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If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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