sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
