Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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