drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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