Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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