i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
