im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
