You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
