Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize
