dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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