what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
