Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
