I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Your topless pictures make me question reality
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
