Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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