What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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