Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
