ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize