Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize