She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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