i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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