No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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