I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
