I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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