He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
We named our party play list daddy issues
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
