nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize