batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
