it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Randomize
