this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Randomize