Screwed.edu
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
