The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize