Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
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