I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Randomize
