The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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