Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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