you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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