giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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