if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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