I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize