Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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