guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
We had sex on a dog bed..
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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