im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I deserve this hangover.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
