I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
