So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
