He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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