Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize