I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
When are your genitals available?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
