I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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