I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Dignity is for republicans.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
