she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
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