I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
