wakey wakey hands off snakey
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
